Random general update

It's random because there won't be much cohesion in the following points:

-I did an overnight last night, 11pm - 8am. I'm back in at five. Apparently, it's not illegal because it's shift work. Although, I may have to ask my friends who work in offices if they're ever kept until 10pm and expected back in at 9am next morning. I'm thinking not.

-I fucking love Supernatural. Looking back, I remember seeing ads for it when it first came on sky living, and I wanted to watch, but we are not a sky living household. We're a 'CI or TLC if there's nothing on the main channels and the boy has gone to bed' household. Seriously, murderous women and cake boss, Supernatural doesn't quite fit in. Anyway, I'm grateful to Mervin, Cat and Ama for mentioning it lots lately and convincing me to try it. So worth it. I've just watched season three in three days (only fifteen episodes, but during overnights, so potentially impressive, right?) only five more until I'm all caught up, ready for when season nine starts up. Dean Winchester is like, my ideal husband. Awesome car (60's Chevy?!), great taste in music, my sort of humour, drop dead gorgeous ... Jensen Ackles isn't half bad either lol.

-I bought this new punk rock album the other day. Most of my favourites are on it. Awesome album. Although, now I have smash mouth in my head ... It was 'Carry on my wayward son' for some reason yesterday ...

-I want chocolate.

-I can't sleep. I probably will drop off ... Just before I'm due to wake up. Tonight is going to suck.

-I take it back, what I said in a post a few days ago. Doing the bridgathon with my mamma. Need to make up my just giving page, right?

Siobhan's Sporking: Billy and Me, chapter 18

Wow. So I just looked at the word count/page count on my word document where I write this ... I have written 30,000 more words about Giovanna's first book than I've written on my second book. About 50 more pages. That's a little frightening.

So, chapter 18 *cracks knuckles* oy. It starts off with Billy telling Sophie she has to read his new script. Me being me, I guessed it was because he was showing off. But no, apparently, he wanted her to read it 'in context' so there were 'no surprises' when it came to the crunch, unlike with his stage play. Apparently, simulating oral sex can be a good surprise for your new girlfriend, but anything more, even from multi-camera where the physicalities are different to get the right angles ... yeah, that shit needs the Bunny Boiler to look it over. And probably veto anything where Billy wears less than a tee and shorts.

I hate this scene so much. Why can't Billy have the balls to stand up and say 'look, this is my job, and it's not like I can just throw coffee over the director if I don't like what he says to me, like you apparently can do in your job. Suck it, bitch.' No, no, he has to appease her. Dude is WHIPPED.

The dialogue still sucks by the way:

"I'm sorry. Just remember it's an amazing script with a brilliant director, who will film it in an artsy way. It's going to look more classy and less like porn."

"What?"

"Argh! See? I'm not good at explaining it," he moans, covering his eyes with his hands. "I just want you to think of it as more of a mechanical thing, rather than something with feelings involved. Just read it, please?"

I repeat. Whipped.

And I hate this thought about actors, that they can't separate their work lives from their real lives. That in day-to-day interactions they must be putting on an act with everyone, yet when it comes to filming or stage work, their true emotions get involved. It's not like doctors, who overanalyse everyone they know because their work is so intense and full on it's hard to get away from it. She's propagating a stereotype and I fucking hate that. Both my sisters got really into acting - one of them even tried out for Italia Conti - and I've never felt they were confusing a script with reality. Likewise, when I write a story, I'm not thinking 'gee, am I writing Crystal and Chloe into Fiesta at all?' because you know what? Only a fucking HACK would do that sort of shit. You can draw on real life, but only in an abstract way.

And Billy grew up acting. He should know this. It should not be a concern and if it is, then he is clearly with the wrong person. If he really thinks he's going to be fucking his co-worker, then his current relationship isn't working out and should be over. Likewise, if she can't trust him to do his job and not confuse fiction with reality then she should get out of dodge. It's so fucking immature.

I really need to de-rage. It's kinda hard with this book.

Anyway, so Sophie grudgingly agrees to read the script. Big reader, my left arse cheek. She should've read that script the second it came through the door, with squeals of 'free, unbound book!' like a certain loser I can think of would do (oh, hush, I used to re-read shampoo bottles in the bathroom if I couldn't remember to take a book in the toilet with me. She has freakin' gold in her house and only reads it with permission? I also once ignored my then-boyfriend when I went to his house so I could read my way through the few books he owned ... I do not buy this bullshit) and even worse, she sends Billy away so she can read without him watching her read. Again, a reader? Honey, you should already be in the pit, smelling the stale smell of sweat, beer and fags, uncomfortable and hot but bubbling inside with the anticipation of the band about to perform ... but no, you stay on the couch and focus on posing for your famous boyfriend.

I am still on this 'she's-not-a-reader' bit for the next couple of paragraphs, because she's still talking out of her arse:

I don't have to read very far into the script to find the first 'love' scene, in fact the film opens with one, and it makes me want to vomit.

She's definitely an A. Takes one to yadda, yadda, yadda. And I want to pause for a second. She can just read this script like a film? Really? I mean, it barely has any directions in it, it reads exactly like her fucking newspaper articles. Shall we google some script images?

 

No idea with what film that is, but notice the formatting? Also, on the day, what do actors work from?

 

A call sheet (hey, this one was Roswell, I loved the shit out of that show). Notice how much of either of those is actually scripted words? And how much is exposition on where the characters are positioned (which is actually blocking, which isn't always on the script, as we saw above)? And what does Giovanna write as the script? Well ...

APRIL, 1971, LONDON, ENGLAND

INT. STAN'S HOTEL ROOM

The door of a hotel room bashes open, in wades STAN BAR - A DANGEROUSLY SEXY ROCK STAR IN HIS LATE TWENTIES - with a woman - MEGAN REACH, EARLY TWENTIES - wrapped around his waist. He carries her into the room and slams the door behind them in haste. The pair grab at each other longingly, exploring each other's mouths, writing around in excitement.

Hey, fun fact, Giovanna's IMDB page lists her work on The Boat That Rocked, which is ... a film about a boat where a pirate radio played rock music, and rock stars hung out. Gee, I wonder where this shit came from. And really, is she throwing some kind of artistic licence into actual scripting? The above on its own? Acceptable stage direction. The next paragraph? It just described the 'writhing around in excitement' in exact detail.

So ... Sophie's definitely an A. Or at least a Gray:

I clench my jaw as I read through the rest of the script, each rub, lick, kiss and grind resonating through my brain, giving me a headache. I place it on the coffee table in front of me, resisting the urge to chuck it across the room, and grab the cushion next to me for comfort, hugging it to me tightly.

Oh, hey dangling participle, do you know what you just did? You just made Sophie put her headache on the coffee table, and want to chuck her headache across the room. Oh, I know 'it' was meant to reference the script, but intention doesn't mean diddly here, the headache is now a physical entity.

But back on point, why would a sexually-loaded script make her react so physically repulsed? Unless she was in the asexual spectrum, I really can't understand it. I mean, I said before I consider myself a Demi, and I would totally have the same sort of reaction to someone fondling the person I'd manage to commit myself to, because damn that would have taken me a lot to go out with them in the first place; but I'd understand the work aspect, and I can shut down my emotions so why wouldn't my actor boyfriend do the same? She's acting like sex is a dirty thing (which it kind of is) and that she's never done it. I just ... she doesn't make any sense to me. She's fucking repressed, for sure, but you'd think Billy gives it to her every now and again, since they share a bed and all, right? Does she equate sex to intimacy? Is that the problem? I genuinely want answers, because to me, her character is so conflicted.

Like, the next paragraph, she whinges some more about how she hates the 'detailed scenes' (yeah, overly detailed) but then says it's a powerful script and she can understand the draw to someone like Billy. She then describes Almost Famous but calls it this script, minus the learner journalist of course.

Sophie's set to full on whine mode, which I am only dulling by watching my Supernatural DVDs as I type. She's blabbing on about how she's not sure if she should be pleased that Billy let her read or not (I'm thinking yes, because I remember the shit Anna Kendrick landed herself in when she 'accidentally' threw out the scripts to one of the Twilight films and Up In The Air) but she acknowledges that she'd have been shocked on set otherwise. That's all she does, she's not grateful for the knowledge, or worried about having to watch, or even trying to schedule it so she misses that day due to her poor constitution and lack of smelling salts. She just makes that brief acknowledgement, before emoing about the reality of Billy's job, and how she can't start throwing her weight around now and making demands.

NO, YOU FUCKING CAN'T! IT'S HIS JOB! YOU BARELY COUNT! *breathes* This isn't like trying to talk Tom out of a GQ photo shoot. It's not like asking him to tone down his lyrics. This is a script which he is now contractually obligated to do and he's just being polite and considerate of your crazy ass ways. You cannot make him void his contract just because you're psychotic. It's not an option, don't even begin to speculate that it might be. You know the only person who can make a request? Billy. And maybe his co-star. And even then, they might not get much sway.

Oh but this bitch doesn't get it ... on two points on this one page:

Reading the script, it makes sense that actors usually date other actors. To those outside of the profession, the notion of sending your partner off to work every day where he'll be fondling someone else is just plain barbaric. At least with two actors they each have to do the same thing, sharing some sort of mutual understanding.

 

I know my reaction to this script is pivotal. If I react badly, blow up and go nuts at the stupidity of someone doing scenes like this when they're in a committed relationship, I'll push Billy away and drive a wedge between us. I'll be giving these girls the advantage of things not being rosy at home. Allowing them to wiggle their way through the cracks and come between us.

Did you think I was kidding about the emo angst? And fuck you, it's not barbaric, it's work. And hey, since I'm watching Supernatural, and Dean and Sam just got pinned by a fucking demon who tried to crush their lungs ... barbaric is all relative. And funnylolstory about the word 'barbaric'? When I was in Rome recently, the tour guides tried telling us that 'barbarian' actually was 'blahblahian' and the Romans used it for anyone who talked in a dialect they didn't understand. Which I guess, in the context of Sophie's pissy little rant, actually does make sense, because it seems to be outside of her dialect.

Anyway, why is her reaction so pivotal? If she and Billy had any real relationship, this shouldn't be an issue. I am going to repeat this until this book ends and I am blue in the face. IF THIS WAS A REAL RELATIONSHIP, THEY WOULD BE STRONG ENOUGH TO WITHSTAND ANY OF THIS. IF SHE WANTS TO DATE AN ACTOR, A WELL-KNOWN ONE AT THAT, SHE NEEDS TO BE MATURE ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH WHATEVER ALREADY EXISTS IN HIS LIFE AND TO FIT IN. THIS RELATIONSHIP SHOULD NOT EXIST BECAUSE SOPHIE FUCKING MAY IS TOO FUCKING IMMATURE FOR THE COMMITMENT THIS SORT OF RELATIONSHIP NEEDS!

And now for the cherry on the shit sundae which is this segment of the chapter:

I have to remain calm and rational, no matter how tempted I am to scream and shout, declaring the whole thing ridiculous. It's only for eight weeks, after all, how hard can that be?

Shove it up your arse.

So the next section is Billy coming through the front door 'puffing in distress' which to me sounds like he just got jumped. Sophie's still making it all about her and how she felt about that fucking script. And ... I'm going to put the passage, because you're going to see a word jump out at you like I did and be like 'are you trying to be meta right now, Giovanna?'

"Paul ..." he says, scratching his head as he screws up his face in angst. "While I was there he found out who'd been cast opposite me in the film."

Yeah, he wasn't nearly beat up, or robbed ... he just found out his co-star, and it's causing him distress.

Oh, and the word of the day was 'angst'. She actually fucking wrote that. About Billy. Muchlols.

So the new co-star is his ex-girlfriend. I would actually be relieved, because someone is an ex for a reason, and it sounds like Billy went into MegaWhore mode after they broke up, so I'm guessing they're very over each other and really, Sophie's worries should be put to rest.

But of course, this is Bad News for Sophie, because he fucked her once, so maybe this will remind them of their glory days and start them fooling around again. They got together through work the first time after all, right? (Isn't Sophie going to BE there? In his trailer, all day every day? Aren't they only going to separate themselves for scenes? When is Billy going to cheat, exactly?) Billy still has to reassure the neurotic mess that is Sophie:

"I know this is going to be really odd, but trust me, it'll all be professional and above board. It's literally a case of putting what where for the camera, anyway."

Although to me, that sounds like this has become an actual porno.

They emo the same shit for two more pages. Mmmmmm, creamy, sickly-sweet filler. The next section, Sophie talks about finding out about Billys ex being his co-star 'makes' her call Molly. Fuck off. You made yourself call your emotional crutch because you're too fucking insecure. Own your shit.

Actually, pause on that thought for a second, because it almost seems like for a nanosecond she does:

I've been so wrapped up in my own torment and misery that I selfishly blocked out how Molly must've been feeling during that time.

So then they start expounding on how shit Sophie's replacement was and how they both suck for trusting her, and how Sally went about betraying everyone, the cow. Oh, and everyone is up in arms because the next article might be about someone cheating about their cooking ... yeah. Quite the scandal, there.

Then Sophie says she's glad the article came out and that Billy knows now and I try not to ragesplode. She's like this guy I work with who will throw tantrums about ANYTHING, cuss all the managers out, act like a brat ... then twenty minutes later come back and say 'I do apologise, I'm so sorry'. Which is the point I basically tell him to go fuck himself (or, you know 'I don't want your empty apologies, I want you to think and act like an adult and maybe not fuck up in the first place? That would be good once in a while. Otherwise, I don't want to hear it') because who wants people like that in their lives?

You know, I don't think Giovanna is actually like this, you know. I think she's trying here to create tension and she's out of realistic options, so she's rehashing the same things over and over. Which is fairly realistic, I have some friends who stick to the same five conversations, but in print, as I've pointed out, it makes Sophie look like a horribly neurotic psychobitch. This should have been a novella.

Ugh, I hate Sophie-and-Molly conversations. They have one word conversations for extra added filler, and it takes So Damn Long to get to the point. And then we have a rehash of the chapter so far with Molly fangirling in between Sophie's blabbering. I'm not kidding, the last few paragraphs in entirety?

"My girl, just remember that it's you he comes home to every night."

"Yes, but is there any point in him coming home if he'd rather be somewhere else? There's so much happening at the moment, opportunities being offered every day - it's all so exciting for him. But for me it's just ..."

"Overwhelming?"
"Yeah. I guess. I've got nothing exciting to give him."
I hear Molly sigh down the phone. "Don't let your doubts get into his head - nothing will push him away faster. That boy loves you, Sophie. You've got to start believing you're good enough."

See? Fangirling. Although, I saw that sigh. Molly's as done with Sophie's shit as I am.

And with that is the end of the chapter, and the end of this blog post, and I am out. Done. See you next time.

Career

So ... once again my friend Cat's work is hiring.

Guess who's reapplied?

Fingers crossed, right? I want a career now, a job I can be proud of, not something teenagers do to make some cash so they can go out/get ready for uni/buy their first car ...

... it's not too much to ask for, is it?

Bridgathon

So, every year, the hospital that treated my TTP have a fundraiser that they call a Bridgathon. It's a six-mile walk across six of the London bridges, and I did it a few years ago with my BFFs. This year is the first year they're officially acknowledging raising funds for TTP research, and I've booked the day off for it from work.

Only problems are? I can't get the registration form up on my laptop properly to fill it in, not without a year's subscription to adobe, which I already have so WTF? And also, thanks UCLH for that difficulty.

Also, I still have this chest infection. And a cold. I feel like shit. I don't think I'm going to be well enough to do it. That completely blows.

Still, if anyone wants to donate, this is the link to sponsor the doctor who's doing it. She's like, the lead researcher in the country, so to me, that's a pretty big deal.

5 more minutes.

Blah, not being able to nap more than an hour before an overnight shift is horrible.

I'm typing this in bed.

Swear I'm getting up ... soon.

Siobhan's Sporking: Billy and Me, Chapter 17

Carter: Hey. It's me again. And Lamb.

Lambrini: Why is she making me read again? Why doesn't Thomas get to suffer too?

Carter: I don't know. She's left a note, but that wasn't her real message. She's Sharpie'd all over my room 'I WAS RIGHT' on the walls and the floor and the furniture and my clothes and ... my mom is going to go crazy.

Lambrini: That was what her note said?

Carter: No, she told me she's watching Supernatural, since everyone all of a sudden is banging on about it constantly and she wants to know what it's about. The girl doesn't even like horror, why the hell's she watching that?

Lambrini: To avoid reading this. Lucky bitch. Can we do what we did last time? You read it and I comment?

Carter: Can I read it like when I have to recite poetry in class?

Lambrini: As long as it's you and not me, I don't care.

Carter: Fine. The first line probably gave zee a heart attack as it was.

The flashing of my phone caused me to stir.

Who wakes up because their phone is flashing?

Lambrini: Did it look like this?

 

Carter: Futurama? Nice. Anyway, Sophie blabbers on about why it would be flashing, and what settings she put it on, and this passes for literature these days? Damn.

She starts name dropping too, and I don't care. I seriously, seriously do not give a shit. She keeps blabbing about how neither of them are working and they're sleeping a lot.

Lambrini: How many ways can you say you do nothing?

Carter: Right? So after blabbing over and over, she decides not to pick up the call. That was worth it. She waits until the end of the second page to bother waking up and picking up her phone.

I'm starting to get why she pawned this off on us.

Lambrini: You've quoted one line and we're at the second page?

Carter: Shut up, it gets worse. I'm just skipping anything not relevant. So it's that Molly chick, and she's saying sorry, she didn't know, not actually making the point until she just hangs up.

Lambrini: Did she burn a cake or something? Because you can just cut that off and cover it in icing. That's what my mum always does.

Carter: She always burns cakes?

Lambrini: *dirty look* want me to leave you with the chick book and go do something interesting, like watch my hair grow? Anyway, why is Molly really apologising?

Carter: It turns out that Sophie's replacement was a journalist.

Lambrini: Oh. Big deal.

Carter: Apparently it is, because Molly never checked her credentials.

Lambrini: Didn't Siobhan say that's how Sophie got the job?

Carter: Uh-huh.

Lambrini: Then she should shut up. Screw it, I'm painting my nails. Think they'll look good like this?

 

Carter: I have no idea whether that, or the book, interests me less.

Lambrini: Doing it anyway. Carry on.

Carter: So there's a bunch of voicemails, and she explains as she goes along, so Sophie can 'piece it together' because apparently, when you're told things outright, you still need to solve a mystery. Sophie now looks like this to me:

 

She then tells us what she thinks happens, which is what Molly told her what happened, which I think we could figure out the moment Sophie said she was suspicious. There's no surprises in this thing.

She hangs up after all her messages and powerful deductions, and 'discards' her phone. Dude, did she throw it, or just leave it on the side?

Lambrini: Can you help me do my right hand? I'm a little bit shaky with it.

Carter: Are you even listening?

Lambrini: Uh-huh, she listened to her voicemail. She got bad news. She got to be right. But I really don't want to blob my varnish everywhere.

Carter: If I do that, you carry this book on.

Lambrini: Ugh, fine, I'll try and do it one-handed. *takes the book and holds hand out to Carter* so blahblahblah, she goes to the shops in her pyjamas, who doesn't, blahblahblah front page shit again. She cries before she reads it, because there's pictures of her with Billy, and her with her daddy. Then she starts to read, and it doesn't sound like any article I've ever read.

Carter: Yeah, she does that. She can't just talk about this stuff, she needs a newspaper to do it for her.

Lambrini: It's just stupid. It's like saying 'oh, I didn't think of this before, but here's some history. Have some history. Is that enough history?'

Carter: Are you summing this up worse than I was?

Lambrini: Pretty much. She called her smile dazzling. In the words of Siobhan:

 

And then we hear about stuff she already said, but then said about her dad dying when she was eleven and how she started being really antisocial.

Carter: Is that why my bedroom is completely wrecked right now? Because I swear like, every one of zee's shitty little recaps talks about her dad dying, and how she knows when it's not been said yet.

Lambrini: Guess so. Apparently everyone tried to pull her out of it, and her mother was depressed and everyone could see it. Sophie was left to care for them both, at eleven.

Carter: So no help from the authorities?

Lambrini: You'd think they'd have a social worker at the very least. For some reason, the article starts talking about Sophie not going on a gap year, or to college. And then there's some crap Molly's obviously said. And God *throws the book across the room.*

Carter: Why'd you do that? That's my thing.

Lambrini: The cherry on the shit sundae. Apparently, the worst thing Sophie had to deal with wasn't losing her daddy, it was being talked about.

Carter: Oh. That would piss you off.

Lambrini: Shit happens! And why is it such a problem to have people know you're going through a tragedy? Some people actually wanna help! I get that it's hard to talk about, sometimes bad things seem nearly impossible to talk about, but it's not like anyone said you pushed him! And in a little village like that, everyone knows everyone, and not many people know isolated tragedy like it, so they're going to be worrying, and if you shut them out, they'll worry to each other!

Carter: Lambrini was top of the rumour mill for a while, if you didn't get it before.

Lambrini: And did I bitch and moan about it? Yeah, okay, it was frustrating, but I was frustrated that no one was coming to me, I was mad about how it started. But the difference was, I had people I could talk to, who I would talk to, so who the fuck cared?

Carter: I like how other people are saying this shit. If she's so withdrawn and won't talk about it, how the hell do they know to put it in an article?

Lambrini: WHICH MAKES EVEN LESS SENSE!

Carter: Okay, okay, calm down, look at your nails or something. I'm done with them. *Picks up the book and finds the place again* Molly blabs about Sophie catching Billy's eye and their 'connection' which is laughable. We have more of a connection than them.

Lambrini: *calming down* Bestest best friends to ever best friend, right?

Carter: That's right, nerd. We get a recap of his awards speech, and this is the most ridiculously long article ever. I'm so bored. Until the last line, because it's hilarious:

Well, it seems that Billy has completed [her life] too, by filling the void left by the sad death of her beloved father.

There are so many Daddy issues.

Lambrini: More than yours.

Carter: I never look at girls and compare them to my dad. Which is probably a good thing, because I don't think women come in that sort of size. So anyway, Billy walks in conveniently at the end of the article, and Sophie's crying and snotting and sounding real attractive. He asks what's wrong and she gives him the article. She hides her face as he reads, naturally. Then Billy starts badgering her about how they even found this stuff out, then remembers that hey, the article said her dad died and maybe she has issues from it, and then asks why she never told him.

Lambrini: These people are horrible.

Carter: Yeah. Billy starts blabbing that he knew something was wrong but he didn't want to ask, I guess because we still have two fifths of the book to go and you can't reveal the big storyline too early, can you?

Lambrini: But you can hint too heavily. I'm not surprised.

Carter: Billy asks for Sophie's version of what happened, and rather than having the conversation continue we get a flashback.

Lambrini: Which Siobhan called on the prologue.

Carter: As we go through, there's going to be more and more reasons why she couldn't put it in the note and just had to make my stuff look like crap, right?

Lambrini: Probably. She's as nuts as you are.

Carter: So the flashback is yet another recap of things we knew, and she throws in some stuff from the prologue to make it look like she has continuity. Apparently, Sophie blamed herself for her dad being hit in a car accident because her mom was pregnant and she didn't want to stop being an only child. Her dad conned her round with talk of hot chocolate, but he had to go to the store for marshmallows, and he got hit on the way back.

Lambrini: I didn't see the baby announcement coming.

Carter: She's a fucking spoiled brat.

Lambrini: Not arguing. Just, that was an actual twist.

Carter: Yeah. So anyway, a couple weeks later, her mom miscarried the kid, which would completely blow *Lambrini leaves the room, slamming the door* and I saw that coming. She probably won't be back. So Sophie blames herself for her dad and hated being pitied, and if this had come earlier as an explanation in some way I'd sympathise, but it just feels jammed in. She blabs on about everything she's written so far and how it relates but nothing flows. I hate this flashback. It's going on and on and on. I need something to amuse myself now Lamb's gone.

 

Without the smiling, that's how I'd look as an anime. Or manga. Whichever one it is.

So apparently, that flashback was her talking, go figure, and she suddenly realises that she's been crying the whole time. Like Bella Swan:

 

 

She starts apologising, for what I don't know, but I really wish she'd grow a backbone. It's tedious listening to her. Billy starts saying all the typical shit, like it's not your fault, don't blame yourself, giving me a blowy would probably cheer you up, and she starts whining that she can barely remember him. I want her to get over herself so bad. Like, does she hear herself? It's any excuse to be a whiny, neurotic mess and I intentionally cut these sorts of people out of my life, because I really don't need the extra added drama. It's dull. I could get it if there was a genuine issue with the person, like they had issues, but she's claiming she's fine and it's circumstance. So it's really fucking annoying for me. She could celebrate her dad every year and remember what a wonderful guy he was, but no, we whine about how we lost him and it's our fault and I feel like I'm going to make an attempt or something soon. It's that bad.

She then blames Molly, for some reason, after I skipped a load of whiny shit. Because she blabbed Sophie's secret. Fuck off Sophie, the woman has cancer. Own your mess. She then starts blaming Carla, who we never even see, because she dared ask Sophie to meet up. It's not even that bad, it's not the guy she screwed and didn't love making a buck out of her because of her association to Billy. That I'd get. But no, Carla felt vindictive because Sophie ignored her text, even though the words are kinda nice, if you can stick reading them.

I hate how Sophie thinks the worst of everyone. Why did Lamb and me agree to do this for her again? She calls her mom at work, but she's taken off. She doesn't answer her home phone either. I'm starting to get where Sophie's such a bitch from. They decide to go visit Sophie's mom and I wanna know how long this stupid chapter is. I wanna up and leave like Lamb. There's way more triggering shit here for me than there is for her.

We flash straight to getting back to Sophie's mom's house, Sophie letting them both in. Her mom's home, looking in boxes at photo's. Did we really need the panic? She calls herself a spoilt brat when her mom says her pictures are from before she was around and she hadn't seen them before because to Sophie, there was only ever three of them. True that. Unfortunately, her mom shoots that down. Then they emo together and I really, really want to smack my head against the wall. And just to make me feel even better, they turn it into how much Billy rocks, because surely Sophie's daddy would have loved Billy too!

I am skimming so many pages right now. I know zee likes to shove in bits of the book every so often but there's just nothing really quotable. It's nearly all been done. Oh, but then someone knocks on the door and it's obviously the guy that Sophie's mom's been seeing. He's called Colin, so I'm totally picturing a loser. He seems lame too, giving an impossipuzzle to Sophie's mom because who gives flowers these days? Sophie then packs some of her own photos to take back to London, and she chats with her mom about Colin the Loser, calling him nice but I can't believe this fake bitch.

Oh God, I have lost count of how many pages this chapter is. A lot, that's how many. It's like, a tenth of the book. Crazy shit. Thanks a lot zee, go blow this book out your ass when you get back.

So on the way back to London after such an adventurous road trip, Sophie and Billy chat about Colin and her mom, blahblahblah. Paul called, zee will be sorry she missed it. He asked how Sophie is and Sophie actually acknowledges it was nice, but then gets all suspicious about why he would be so nice.  Maybe because you're somehow important to Billy? I don't know. And I just don't care.

That's finally the end of the chapter. Thank fuck. And I would cuss that bitch zee out, but I don't want her to force this on me again. So instead, zee, here's all the actors you perve over. If this doesn't bring you back, I don't know what will. And yes, I included the Supernatural guys, since you're suddenly all about that.

... is that enough yet?

Car insurance

So, I've been roadworthy for just over a year. I have a second generation fiesta zetec, which is an awesome car to drive with a lousy reputation (it's okay Fifi, I can relate, even in Italy someone was asking if we were going to try Vesuvius in stilettos. I hugged the awesome heart-patterned converse I was wearing then, too) anyway, because of it's crappy reputation + my newness in driving, my insurance was horrible last year. I mean, for a twenty-seven year old novice. It was like, £1300 best offer, and most were £4000.

I have a whole year's no claims. I've just renewed my insurance (this time with a company I've actually heard of before) and it's half of last year's offer.

I'm still female. It's still a fiesta. I'm still a girl. I still hit the curb a little yesterday. It's still awkward as hell answering those questionnaires thanks to my 24-7 shift-patterned store (I have 7 overnights this week, but the majority of the time I will be parking on my drive, so ...) so how comes one year of no major road problems nets me a £650 average quote?

Logic's a bitch.